Hail Eris!

For those of you who might not know I follow the path of the Discordians, being, like, a card-carrying member of the LDD and P.O.E.E. You could learn more about the wonders and merriment of the Discordians through some reading matter, though I would suggest trying out the Illuminatus Trilogy! as written by Robert Anton Wilson and Robert Shea. Not only does it constitute a jolly good read, featuring, as it does, a great deal of graphic sex, drugs and violence, reanimated undead Nazis, a golden submarine, the Kraken, John Dillinger and the unforgetable Hagbard Celine, it also provides vital information on the Illuminati! and their nefarious workings. It is, of course, a work of fiction, apart from those sections which aren't, and the sections which are inspired by real events which, whilst at least semi-fictional, are also not entirely genuine.In addition to this fine tome of work, there does exist the Principia Discordia, which is by way of being essentially the 'bible' of the Discordians, though it would be fairer to say it isn't really as in all honesty it's nothing like the same, since it's a collection of thoughts and musings passed down from Trippy Hippy to Insane Vandal to Elucidating Penguins each step of the way but it may have some geunine scraps of text directly from Eris, who is your Goddess, and certainly it's full of a great deal of interesting nonsense. A lot of it refers to accessing your pinneal glands, which can be useful if they need a poke. I'd say required reading but that would imply there was some entity that was requiring it, and frankly, no-one in the LDD, the P.O.E.E. or indeed one would imagine Eris herself would really give a flying damn if you do, or don't, so make your own damn mind up, who am I, your mother?

 

So what's in it for me?

Well, you, actually. What IS in it for you? In any case, the main acitivites of your average Discordian are their business. Here, though are some of the things I get up to in the name of sowing non-linear thought processes and liberating the mindsets of the masses by half-arsed subversion. I'll be adding more whenever I think of something else to do.

These are the Golden Apple Seed Missions.

PosterGASM
I drink in a little pub called the Colonnade Bar, it's not on North Street in Brighton but it very close by on New Road, which isn't very new at all. If, in the Colonnade one goes downstairs one finds, amongst other transient things like Alice getting laid by a random stranger, or Kingy laying a mighty shit-brick that cracks the foundations with its immense mass, the toilets, wherein are little A4 signs on the backs of the doors. These feature simple sprung hinges and so I simply replace these with more Discordian minded ones on an ad-hoc basis. The Chao to the left is a link to a PDF of the PosterGASMs so far created and employed.

PopeGASM

It is the position of the vast majority LDD and especially P.O.E.E. and most especially, probably, Eris herself, that every man, woman and child (plus some really bright animals, and on the off chance they turn up some time, aliens) is a fully qualified Pope with all the rights and priviledges so given, which mainly consists of the right to claim ineffability. The Chao to the left is a link to a PDF of Pope cards which you ought to feel free to download, print, and distribute to any and all as you see fit.

PPOGASM

The Chao on the left links to a PDF of the Pirate Pass-Off game. This game, and its derivatives are excellent Discordian fun as they subvert the paradigm boundaries of players and non-players and can serve to spread the word of the Holy Huh?.
Badges
The Chao to the left links to a series of name badge sheets I generated for my birthday, and then for Steve's birthday. Mine was superhero themed, everyone got a randomly chosen 'goody' or 'baddy' name badge from a large bag. Steve's party had an 'erotic' theme and so people picked a random name badge from either the blue 'studs' box or pink 'sluts' box. Much fun was had by all. To make the badges up, I printed them then spray-mounted them to 5mm foam core, then sliced them out and taped safety pins to them. Worked fine in both cases.

 

 

 

 

Part of the End